Disney Lied to Me: Why Love Isn’t Enough…

This entry was difficult to write but very cathartic at the same time. I hope you appreciate my transparency.

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‘Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.”

~Alfred Lord Tennyson

I wish that I could believe that love is enough. If so, I’d be married by now. Unfortunately, that’s not how things unfolded for us but I will always love him.

 We have a lot of history. I met him when I was 24 and he was 32. He is different – a little quirky. I like that. He is brilliant. I can be 100% myself with him – I don’t let my guard down for many people, but I know that I can say anything to him and feel comfortable.  I’m just amazed that we know each other so well. He recently told me that he needs to guard his heart with me because I change my mind sometimes. He knows I’m fickle and very indecisive. I know how he will respond in certain situations. It’s like we were made for each other.

 Things were going well for a while, but then I realized that the relationship was draining me because of circumstances that are out of his control (people who are close to me know what I’m talking about. I don’t feel the need to put his business out there like that). I stayed because I wanted to make it work. Then one day I woke up and realized that I couldn’t do it anymore – not because I didn’t love him, but because I saw a glimpse of my future with him and it was not what I envisioned for my life.

That didn’t stop me from going back to him a few times even though I always ended up with the same outcome. It’s not in the cards for us. It’s not fair, but it’s life. I still communicate with him. I try to be a friend to him because he doesn’t have many people in his life, but it’s complicated because we’re friends who love each other. I admit that our communication sometimes opens the door for my feelings to resurface.

I know I can’t go back. I know that is not those close to me would want for me. More importantly, I don’t think that is what I want for me. The important lesson that I gained from our doomed relationship is that love is simply not enough. Yes, I want love. I also want stability, a partnership, and security just to name a few things. I want to say I will never get back together with him but I don’t know what the future holds. I do know that a relationship is a not an option right now and I’m not waiting for that time to come. I’m fine with that. I have not idea what is going to happen but I definitely want God’s best for me.

 

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2 thoughts on “Disney Lied to Me: Why Love Isn’t Enough…

  1. I totally agree with you Brandi. I too have had a similar experience. Love is good, but is not good enough. There are many other facets to a relationship and love is just one aspect that needs to be supplemented or complemented by so much more. You have the right approach however, concluding that you want God’s best for you. We just have to leave our lives in his hands because we know he’s gonna work it all out. I love your blog…so inspiring. 🙂

    • Hello! I’m glad you’re able to relate. Yes, you’re so right because God will indeed work it out. Thank you so much for the support. I just speak from my heart and from experiences. I’m glad to see that the things I write about are relatable. 😉

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